"It feels so wrong, it feels so right."




Had a filling time having supper with S and A at Boon Lay's Nasi Lemak stall @ 0200H. The nasi lemak was OK, not anything fantastic and the teh tarik was a tad too sweet i guess. But if you're hungry, everything must go, can go and lets go! Macam the lelong! lelong! at the bazaar Geylang during hari raya period.

Before that i had buka puasa at Mak's Place (literal translation: Mother's Place) down at Changi Road there, near Geylang. Ate with A & his brother, I. Not "I" as in "me" but its his initials. S was supposed to join us, but last min paitau, buih, bubble, fly aeroplane, never come and many other ways of saying....errr... "never come lah!". That being that, we ended up ordering Tom Yam soup ($6.50), Lemon chicken ($10) and Buttered Squid ($12). BUT i tell you... its really A LOT! The serving they give for the rice, like damn a lot. Until i cannot finish. Can you imagine?!

Best part, its damn filling to the max. Wanna go there again uh! I was closed by the food. Hahaha. Spent a whoppin $11 per person though, a bit expensive. But THANKS UH "S" FOR NOT COMING! Hahahaha!


Anyways, while at Boon Lay, the topic about relationships came up. Then marriage. And i for one, didnt like talking about it. Truth be told, i couldnt see myself commiting to a marriage. Maybe because im still young at heart and mind. Although im NOT gay as many people think i am (just because i hang out more often with guys than the opposite sex), i personally feel that im not ready to commit. Yet.

Maybe what i really want is to experience the luxuries of life, money and freedom that God has "given" to us but we all fail to search for it. Always hoping that it'll come our way by just praying and praying and having faith in it.

Praying is one thing. Putting in the effort is another. I want to enjoy freedom first before commiting to someone. Love to me, is a very strong word. A feeling you cant just say "I love you" and next year or so, you break up. Maybe i dont want to feel hurt. Maybe im just emotionally soft inside me while my exterior and fighting spirit is just booming with confidence.

But one thing's for sure is that if i ever "fall in love" with that certain someone, i'll promise to give my best and to give her the luxury of life that she should be receiving. You know like drive her around in my Porsche or Lamborghini and living in The Coast at Sentosa Cove... Nothing fanciful really. I just dont want to see my special one suffer.

Hey, Im just being responsible here, ok?



Your (alpha) Romeo,
Bil